Peace of Mind

Every day I sit and meditate for 10 to 30 minutes.  This is what I like too think of as my "ME" time.  I calmly try to think through the events of my day and the different things that I know are coming up. Then, slowly, I let go of everything... like a check-list.  I remind myself that these are only tiny pieces of my day, and that they have no hold on me...  I decide how my day will begin and how it will end...
I will admit that this whole process seems to get harder and harder as I get older... as I progress in my scholarly status... as I continue in taking on new projects as work...  in meeting and getting to know new people... in dealing with the issues of other people.... It makes life really complicated.  I have to keep reminding myself that this is how life works... it is an uphill battle.  When you think you are in a good place in your life,... a tragedy happens, or your mind reflects on a bad thought, or someone brings you their burdens and asks you to help hold them up...  It is just the way of things.  But you can decide how you will remember your days, how you will progress.
It is amazing how sitting in one position, closing your eyes, and slowly breathing in and out can be so releaving.  It can complete change your out-look on things, it can release some of the pressure on your mind.
To all my friends and loved ones, plus those of you that I do not know, I would like to encourage you to take a moment to breath.  Close your eyes and just breath.  Push your thoughts aside, and just be with your self for a second or two... Then I promise you that taking on the world will be just a little bit easier for you.

First Comes Marriage - Debbie Macomber

So I just finished reading Debbie Macomber's First Comes Marriage.  It is a short witty novel about a loving grandfather keeping to old traditions in our modern culture in order to make the lives of his only granddaughter and new business partner fulfilling.  Anton, the grandfather, is an extremely wealthy business owner in Seattle who is getting ready to retire.  But before he does, he wants to marry off his only granddaughter Janine.  Being of the old country, he believes that the best thing for Janine is an arranged marriage... to his new young business partner, Zack, whom he will be living his business to.  Through a series of well planned entanglements by Anton, Janine and Zack find each other through methods of which might be old fashioned to the 21st century.  This was a very comical and sweet story.  Perfect for an evening paired with a hot cup of tea.

Thank you Gabriell for the book.

Food for thought...

I was thinking about the whole word thing again.  And I of course was trying to figure out a way in which I could find or discover my word...  I actually asked a random lady at work today, (note: I haven't known her very long, like two maybe three weeks, she is in her 40's though) "when you look at me... really look at me... what is the first word that comes to your mind?"
For those of you who think this is a weird question to ask basically a complete stranger, well I will agree with you.  But here is what I was thinking... Who you are... on the inside, like your core self, could it be more easily noticed or well recognized by a person who doesn't know you, a person who has no real opinion or history with you?...  You know how they say that your first impression means everything, or at least it's really really important.  Well, along those lines are what I believed might be a way of interpreting or alluding to one's word.
And her answer... was Passion.
I asked her why she chose that word and she said it was simple, "She could see a passionate soul through my eyes."  What drove that passion or what was it's source she did not know.
So how about that folks?  I personally do not think that is my word... or maybe it is, but if it was your word, don't you think that you would be able to recognize it... at least in some fashion?

Commited... Do you really know what that means?

Because it's me, as soon as I finished Elizabeth Gilbert's Eat, Pray, Love, I had to jump right into the sequel Committed - A Skeptic Makes Peace with Marriage.  And you know how older people warn you to look before you leap... well I didn't look, and kinda got smacked in the face by this book.  Not literally of course, but that kinda thing where it digs up old thoughts that you haven't touched in years and shakes you up now that you are looking at them kinda wack in the face.  Needless to say I was going through a sporadic range of emotions and ideas while reading this book, mostly because it was pissing me off because it was making me reflect on my families numerous marriages, but was also bringing up some really good points and ideas that I agreed with,  so instead of putting it down and not looking at it, I kept reading.  I gotta give it to ya Elizabeth, you really hit it out of the park with this one, but I doubt they are going to turn it into a movie.
Any way, I like how she has separated each chapter with a different issue in regards to marriage. So Marriage and Surprises, Expectation, History, Infatuation, Women, Autonomy, Subversion, and Ceremony.  She discusses her issues with each topic, the history of the topic, how it relates to her and Felipe's relationship, and how it relates to the part of the world they are currently staying in at that time.  So no surprises when you actually realize that this is a book of a woman thinking about the entirety of marriage on paper....
Men, this might be good reading material for when you decide to take your relationships with women seriously... but word to the wise... digest it in baby steps... we don't want you to hurt yourselves.
Though I am saying this is a good book, I will not say that she covers all the bases when it comes to marriage.  Could you really do that in one book? Well, she doesn't and she also alludes to it that she can't and that that wasn't the point of the book anyway.  This is a book where a woman has literally discussed with herself and a few recorded conversation with other people about what marriage means to her and those around her and how she thinks it will affect her the second time in the ring... or well wearing the ring I guess. 
I think that marriage has always left a bitter taste in my mouth after watching both of my parents and a few uncles and aunts get married over and over again.  I will admit that at one point I swore to myself that I never wanted to get married, because I didn't want to be continuously sad like they were.  But then I was introduced to the romance novel and I saw other families outside of my own living happy, healthy lives as one marvelously functioning unit.(unlike my own)  I knew that my brothers and I got the shit end of the stick but that didn't mean it would always be that way.  Eventually we could go to college or move out of our parents homes and make our own trouble... life's cruel that way.  Though I do believe it is better for you to learn things the hard way yourself instead of in the shadow of someone else.  What I really want to get across here is that this book will make you think, not just about your experiences when it comes to or witnessing marriage, but also about what you want out of marriage.  Being committed...

Next blog post will discuss what it means to be Committed...

What Is Your Word?

So the girls and I recently decided to read Elizabeth Gilbert's book Eat Pray Love and there was a section of the book which particularly struck a cord with me.  In the book Elizabeth, while in Italy, goes through a situation where she and her companions contemplate what a city/person/country's word is.  For example, when discussing the word for the Vatican, one might think FAITH, but instead the Italians explained it was POWER... and as a non-catholic I can see how it is power over faith.  Religion is a business first you know.  When you think of New York City, the words ACHIEVE and SUCCEED tingle the mind the most.  And then the punch line for the whole thing was that Rome's word was SEX, and Elizabeth was definitely not indulging in that word just yet.
But back to my point, when you really think of someone or someplace or something there is usually that word or set of words which helps you think of or describe said person/place/thing, right?  So one thought led to another and it got me wondering what was my word?
I am a daughter, sister, friend, lover, writer, reader, scholar, giver, researcher, but those words describe only a small part of me... what I am, what I do, but not who I am.  Now if your thinking anything along the same lines I did, you be tossing the ideas of how can you really pick one word to describe you? didn't it take a long period of time before people could really give it a word? who decides that word? me? my friends and family?
It's really a brain teaser ain't it?  Well, at this point in time I can't even come close to really thinking about my word, but I just thought I would throw that idea out there.

Happy reading folks.

 This looks like it would be a great thinking spot to contemplate that word.

Get Your Act Together

So vacation is over and there is only about a month left till school starts.  I have read so many books this summer that is sorta kinda hard to review them all... I remember my favorites of course, but that is only because this is like the thousandth time I have read them.  Oh, but so many more books and poems do I have before me.  It almost hurts. 
I have Lady living with me now... She is an absolutely adorable Yorkie-poo.  She gives me a reason to role out of bed in the morning, ... to take her out to go pee & poo.  She also gives me something to come home to and play with and goof around with... she is fabulous.  I'm not alone anymore.  This is great.

I'm missing some of my friends from back home.  I won't be able to see them until Christmas, but then some of them won't be there.  Oh, scheduling sucks horribly.  But everything seems to be on the up and up, except for my bank account.  That won't go up really until I get the loan money from Direct Loans.... counting the days.
But life is good. And that is what really matters.

Attempting To See The Good

One of the truths about life is that it is extremely complex.  Intertwined with the good is the bad,and with the bad the good. Life is of course then never easy. We will view things as easier than others,but life is complicated and hard.  Sometimes it is hard to make basic decisions,but then it is easy to make life changing decisions. Or the other way around,which for most is the easier.
What I have been thinking about the last couple of days is being optimistic.  For most of the people I know this is an easy task, but then for those chosen few, this is a complication within their life... basically they can't see what everyone else does. I have made a point in my adult life to stick to being optimistic because being depressed all the time in my mind is no way to live.  I'm not saying that I never get depressed, because I do. I just choose not to dwell on it, or I am trying really damn hard to avoid it.
So let's face it. There are a lot of shitty things going on for the young adults today.  The job market basically sucks.  So you are forced to decide between your happiness at home or trying to do something new somewhere else where you are not as familiar.  Some of you,like myself have no issue with this. You are willing to run into the distance and take on what ever challenges the world has out there for you. But then there are those of you who no matter what your circumstances are now want to run home as soon as you can.  And well, though I might not agree with your decision, it might be the best thing for you. Truth is, that some people just weren't meant to leave their family nest. And that is sad I think. I am not saying that there is something wrong with having roots. Everyone just has to make up their mind on whether they want to stick to the roots their parents set for them, or whether or not you want to stand up for yourself and set up your own roots.
If you decided to go to college and your parents are not paying your way, then you are putting yourself further and further into dept with college loans.  That is the case the case for me. Since I decided not to stay in TN and spread my wings elsewhere, I am well...... very very in dept to the government and Sallie Mae.  On top of that I decided to get a vehicle because I needed to be able to move around on more than just the metro and my own two feet.  That set me a few thousand back, and now I am having to pay for insurance and gas.  Yeah so I have a lot against my name right now, and guess what ... that is ok.  Everyone doesn't start out rich out their asses to where they really don't have to work for anything.  Getting in dept and paying it off is a cycle of modern life.  It symbolizes accomplishment. If you have to work for what you have, then you will appreciate things in life more than those people who just have stuff handed to them.  Because I am having to work off my education, I understand what separates me from other people.  I realize that not everyone got the chance to do what I am doing, and some people had to settle when I decided not to.  Not that everyone did, but what I am doing sets me apart... just like everyone else who is trying to do things completely on their own.  Now a few of my friends still depend on their families because the opportunity for them to get away just hasn't opened. To you I say keep doin what you have to for yourself.  If you keep pushing,your door will open and you will be free to make your own mistakes and truly live your own life.
So I guess in conclusion people, I am saying give life a chance.  You might not be in the situation you want to be in, but keep pushing and eventually you will.  Take the time to realize what you have and embrace it. Discover your strengths and revel in them.  Do what it takes so you can stand strong on your own and be proud of yourself.  Be able to smile at life, even though it might not be smiling on you now.

Us vs. The Rest of the World

It seems lately that I have had to have several conversations with people on how it is that the world seems to be fighting against us.  The idea that the world is pushing against all efforts and that no matter what we do, we seem to not be able to out-wit the world.  But I wonder, is this really the case?  Can the world really fight against you when all there is is what you and your elders have put into it?

In order to explain my advice, I must define some key terms.
So what exactly is the "world"?  I have come to understand it as everyone else who inhabits this planet besides ourselves.  It also may include the natural forces of nature of which we can influence,sorta,but can not actually manipulate or change.  It or they are everything else that affects our daily lives and decisions. For example, the oil spill in the Gulf is explained to be a man-made natural disaster.  Because of this open oil field which has been continuously spilling into our ocean for more than a month now, we can not really take and beach vacations to the Gulf. The contamination in the water is due to man's desire for oil with out any true means of control. There have been several efforts to decrease or stop the flow of oil,but it seems that all we are doing is making it worse.
What is the connection between us and the actions of other people?  I find this explanation to be the hardest. We are our own individuals who are responsible for our own personal actions. This applies to every human being on this planet. Now some actions are group efforts,like a team sport or an organized group event, and some individual actions affect groups outside of themselves,like suicide bombings.  Whether we want to admit it or not,our own personal actions in some way or another affect the lives of everyone else in the world. It is a grand concept, I know, but it doesn't make it any less true.  Here is a small example:
You go to the grocery store and you purchase and apple. Now in purchasing that one apple you have actually done several things. 1-you provided profit for the store in which you purchased the apple, 2-you provided a profit for the farm which grew the apple, 3-you increased the demand for more apples from that farm and that store, 4-you have given the opportunity for the clerk to do there job and then receive a pay check for that work. That is just a bit of the financial side of it I believe. For the more natural side of things: this can go either of the two ways...1-you have purchased something that once you have finished eating may be ground up and used as plant food with the rest of your fruit and vegetable mush or 2-if you toss the apple in the trash,you are providing job opportunities for garbage personnel and garbage separators.  For you personally  you have chosen something healthy which will not add to the luxury of your waist line and will help keep the doctor away.
Now my advice. I like to keep an optomistic point of view when it comes to our lives and the lives of others. It keeps things a lot less stressful, if you know what I mean.  In a sense,it is us against the world, but you must understand that this is nothing to be afraid of because everyone else is in the same shoes that you are.  Everyone no matter who they are,where they live,what their job is, who their family is, none of it matters.  These things can help when it comes to certain situations you face in your life,but the bottom line is it is you against the world. Now I hate having to pull the God card, but it apparently really helps with some people. You should know the line.... God will never give you more than you can handle. For some that is all they need to hear because of their unexplainable faith in whatever their god of choice may be. But for others,like myself,I like to explain things in a more we are the natural wonders of the world sort of thing.
Man was once just a cave creature. It roamed from place to place living off of natural animal instincts. Then when it was time, either by accident or inspiration, man created fire,he created the wheel,clothing,and on and on and on up till now where we are using almost completely man made everything for everything in our lives. We, man, are adapters and creators. Some of us might not think of ourselves as master inventors but we can adapt better than any other creature on earth. Whether it be family,financial,job,or relationships, or any other life situation, we will have something put on our plates,then we will continue on. We will fix,compromise, reconsider,change,give up, rethink, learn.... whatever it takes to keep us on our feet,that is what we will do. The fact is,some events hurt more than others,and it might take a little more umph to get us back on our feet and on our way. The goal/point is that we do it. We do to succeed. We do to accomplish. We do to live.

Yin and Yang

I have always been fascinated by the Yin and Yang symbol.  The simplicity of it captures the attention of every generation.  It wasn't until this last year when I took World Religion's and Taoism and Confucianism that I was truly able to learn about this symbol.  It's physical design may be simple, but it's inner meaning is far more complicated.
Out of the chaos came the balance of Yin and Yang.   It is not the elements of good and evil, but it is instead the presence of balance.  Yin, the feminine essence, represents the cool, female, water, light, etc.  The Yang represents the hot, male, fire, dark, etc.  In the cycle of life, there is in the height of Yin, the presence of Yang.  And in the height of Yang, there is the presence of Yin.  The initial idea is a balance of all things.
In our modern lives, I think that it is difficult to find that balance of all things.  We will try when we think the balance has gotten to rough, but in truth we should try to keep the balance every day.  Yoga and revitalization in the morning.  Exercise and invigoration during the day.  Cool down and relaxation in the evening.  Inn this cycle we can maintain a healthy balance in our lives.  I think it's worth trying.

Southern Charm

The thing about Nashville and most of the state of Tennessee is that no matter where you go you are welcomed with a smile and a helping hand.  Whether you are trying to see the city, travel through the country side, discover something new and musical, or just trying to get your stuff out of your car, Tennesseans are always willing to help.  I have lived outside of the state of Tennessee for three years now, and I am still baffled by how different the rest of the country is from my southern home.  Truthfully, Tennessee moves at a bit of a slower pace.  People actually take the time to enjoy the air and embrace the sunshine.  Everywhere you go, someone is willing to strike up a conversation with you about almost anything.  If you are thinking of family and friends, plus a good time, or reminiscing on good times, you have found the place.  I am proud to say that I am a Tennessean, and I am glad that I am able to show the people in Washington, DC, Maryland and all of my college peers what true Southern Charm is. 

I purchased my Honda CR-V

This is my 2006 Honda CR-V EX SUV 4WD.  She is gold with a cool tan interior.  Hey camping trips.  Here we come!!!

Getting a vehicle in another state

So setting things up to get my first paid for by me vehicle is going rather crabby,but is moving along. The plan was to purchase car insurance before I left Maryland so that when I purchase the vehicle in Tennessee,things will go much more smoothly. This is sorta not going to happen. I will set up renters insurance so that they have all of my information. I will then go to Darrel Waltrip Honda in Cool Springs Tennessee and purchase a Honda CR-V EX-L(used),probably a 2008.  Then I will call State Farm and set up the car insurance so that I can drive off the lot with my new(used) SUV. Because I live in Maryland,I will have to wait and come back to get plates and register the car here.  That sucks for me because I really don't want to be associated with Maryland drivers because they all basically don't know how to drive. What I mean is,  I have yet to see a Maryland plated driver follow the road rules. This is all so frustrating. But it will be ok. It will all happen on Monday and then I will be happy.  I hope.

What's Up~Update

So last week I decided to plan out my goals for the summer to keep myself more on track of things.  And well, things haven't been moving quickly,but it has only been a week. The only place I've deep cleaned this week was the kitchen. I can't wait to reorganize it the way I want it, I just have to go home and get my car first.  I spent a few hours in Ikea and Bed, Bath, and Beyond the other day. Saw several things I would love to have, but knew I couldn't afford as of right now. I also price checked the items I would buy and verified that they would still be there till around the end of Julyish. When it comes to the car,I'm still trying to pick an insurance company to go with. I'm stuck between Allstate and Progressive. I know more people with Allstate and the representatives that I have talked to on the phone have been pretty awesome.  However, the Progressive representatives have been just as helpful and have taken the initiative to work out what my insurance plan would be like/consist of,and discussed with me what I could expect in the next 5 or so years.  Not that any of that was true, it's just hard picking an insurance.  I would just rather not get screwed out of the gate, if ya know what I mean. Also when it comes to studying, I have started making note cards to study for the GRE.  I really need to get on top of that because I wanted to take the exam at the beginning of July.  The faster I go, the more information I'll have in my head.  Lets see.... oh, I did go to the mall and other stores to look at clothes and I hate to report that I really didn't find things that I was looking for.  I don't know if I'm just out of season or what, but the styles just aren't my type right now.  Yuck, right. Then last but not least, exercise.  I have been pretty good with my yoga but when I'm supposed to get up in the morning to run, i turn off my alarm and roll over.  It sucks, but o-well. I'll get up eventually.  So, now on to doing stuff and living my life.

Collecting Works to Study for Comps

Wow was I wrong.... I thought I had all of the works listed for my English comps exam next year,but I was way off. Instead I only have like 2/3's of the list. I checked amazon to see what the grand total of all the purchases might be and I'm looking to spend another 100-200 dollars on books to read from and analyze before January 2011.  I have plenty of time,but it just means that I won't really get to read any of my cheesy romance novels or Dan Brown mysteries until...well, January 2011. This blows.  But all for the sake of a great education right?

Irish Born - A favorite on my shelf

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There are several Nora Roberts novels on my shelves and I may say with a smile on my face that this is without a doubt one of my favorites.  Irish Born is a combination of three books titled Born in Fire, Born in Ice, and Born in Shame.  Each story follows the thoughts, emotions, and experiences of the daughters of Tommy Concannon.  He was a father trapped in a marriage without love, but he had an undying devotion for his daughters, two he raised with his own hands and one whom he never had the privilege to meet but loved all the same.  Maggie is the daughter who came from a moment of passion and nothing more.  She was viewed by her mother as the spawn of sin, and being such could never achieve anything except in sin.  Maggie has a burning personality which draws in the viewer but does not ask for their sympathies.  She stands on her own two feet and from her furnace builds works of fierce flaming art that gives us her story.  Brianna is the daughter who came from duty.  She was her mothers fulfillment to the church and was then raised as such.  She didn't have as hard a time as Maggie in certain ways, but she too suffered.  She is the home maker who turns her inheritance into a inn for travelers and families.  Her home is welcome to all, and more importantly so is her heart.  Shannon is the daughter conceived in adultery.  She was born and raised an American, but with the death of her mother and the man she thought her father, she goes to Ireland to discover herself and the heritage she never knew.  Nora Roberts once again gives us a series which pulls at the heart yet inspires the mind.  Once again I have this yearning to go see these roaming green hills and communities of passion and stories.  If you have a moment or two, let Nora tell you a tale.  I promise you will then go to sleep with a smile on your face and a warming love in your heart.

Irish Born - Nora Roberts

I absolutely love this series.  I breezed through the first novel Born in Fire, which was intense and awesome.  Then I finished the second novel Born in Ice this morning, which was a beautifully told story that tore at my heart.  I will be starting the third novel Born in Shame this afternoon.  I won't go into the full story details until I finish the third novel because I think this series should be read all at ounce, back to back.  If you are looking for a quick and intriguing read, I suggest you stop at your nearest Barnes and Noble and pick this up.  I can't read anymore because I want to start reading.  Good Bye!

For the Love of Cooking

To me, one of the greatest experiences life has to offer is cooking.  Having food made for you is great and all, but to really work in your kitchen and prepare a meal for your family and friends to me is one of the most rewarding things you can experience in life.  A film recently came out that is based on two women and their love for food and cooking.  For those of you who know me, you know that I am a sucker for inspirational films, and this one really kicked the bucket.  The film is of course Julie and Julia.  Julia Childs chose to cook because she loved food and needed something to do now that she wasn't participating in politics.  Julie is a modern disheveled woman who is trying to finish something in her life, show herself that her life amounts to something... so she decides to cook her way through Julia Childs cookbook while keeping a blog.  Blogs are amazing tools, aren't they?  Well after watching this movie, I had this undying urge to make brushetta, which I did and it was fabulous.  I'm not going to copy the movie and cook my way through a cook book, instead I am choosing to educate myself further in preparing foods and developing my culinary skills if you will.  I'm currently living with and dating an Italian, so learning to properly handle pasta is essential.  I tried to make eggplant parm a couple of times and I have to admit that the first two batches were an absolute disaster.  The key was learning how to properly cook eggplant thoroughly, which isn't easy.  I eventually got it and now my eggplant parm is fabulous.  I'm no Italian chef, but I'm learning as I go along.  So I guess this is something we can add to the long list of things I'm trying to do in my life.  I want to improve my cooking skills.  Wish me luck, and I'll let you know how it goes.

The Start of Summer

So I am officially in my first week of summer.  Wahoo!!!  There are a lot of things that I would like to fit into this summer, but as we all know, we never have enough time to do everything.  So in short(not really), here are my plans:

• Deep-clean the Apartment.
• For those who know me, you know that I am a bit of a neat freak.  And since I started living with Vinny, I have had to back off a bit when it comes to keeping my place tidy because Vinny and I have two completely different definitions of what clean is.  So needless to say I can't wait to get him out for a while so that our place won't have that faint odor of ass.
• Start obtaining new furniture and redecorating.
• Almost everything in that apartment was given to us, or a left over from the house that Vinny used to live at.  Being that Vinny used to live in a house of all guys, you can imagine how everything isn't exactly in the greatest condition.  But being as it was my first real place, I could not complain or really cared at the time about the condition of things.  I have maintained this residence for just over a year and I would like to make it more homey and comfortable.  This will require moving things, purchasing new things, taking down things that never should have been put up in the first place, etc.
• Getting a car.
• I will be traveling home in the next few weeks and I intend on purchasing a vehicle.  A Honda CR-V to be exact.  I'm entering my senior year of college and its about time I be able to get around on my own.  This will hopefully also fix some of my relationship issues because since I moved off campus, I have not been able to spend hardly any time with my friends and I have missed some rather great moments.  I love having my place and I would like to be mobile now.
• Study for and take the GRE.
• In order to apply to grad schooling I have to take the GRE and get the highest score I can.  I will start putting study materials together at the end of this week.  My plan is to take the exam in the beginning of July.  I will also be studying for the GRE subject exam, but I won't be taking that test until November.
• Study for senior comps exams.
• In order to graduate from CUA, I need to pass the senior comprehensive exams for English Lit majors.  Basically it is a test on everything I have learned while at CUA.  To prevent cheating and duplications of exams, every year a subject or genre is chosen to narrow down the spectrum of the exam.  My senior comps will be based on Poetry.  We were given a list of the texts in which the exams will be be based, which makes this a lot easier.  I will finish collecting the texts I don't have and start reading the lengthier text in order to have finished reading everything by the end of the summer.  I will take in depth notes while reading the texts and then will probably be discussing them here to keep my mind fresh on the topics.
• Redo the wardrobe.
• This is one of the items from my list of things to do this year.  I have to admit that I have made no progress in this area, mostly because I haven't had time to shop.  I plan on making a trip this weekend to Filene's Basement in order to get some summer basics and a few comfortable professional items.
• Get Ready for the Army 10 miler.
• A few of my friends have run in this marathon before.  We, me and my lot of friends, are doing this as a bonding experience and something extremely memorable for our senior year.  We will most likely be doing a run in the spring as well.  I loved running in high school and I staid pritty fit my freshman year of college.  It is these last two years, with moving to a desk job and away from the free gym, that I have really slowed down and not been any where near as active.  My friend Gabriel and I planned on training together this summer, but she rolled her ankle two days ago so now I am without a running partner.  I think I will run in the evenings or early mornings to stay away from the heat, plus I think running is a great way to either start or end your day.
• Reading for pleasure.
• I love reading, so studying for those tests will not bother me at all, but I have to read for the pleasure of reading too.  In between all those studies, I will also read books that I am interested in and stuff from authors that I love.  I am currently reading Nora Roberts Irish Born series.  I finished the first book yesterday and am nearly half way done with the second book.  When I have finished this series, I will read Dan Brown's latest novel The Lost Symbol, which is supposed to be a continuation of the adventures of his symbolist character Robert Langdon.  I greatly enjoyed both  The Davinci Code and Angels and Demons, so this continuation should not be disappointing at all.

 Now that I have worked that out, I'm going back to working at my full time job, which I will also be doing this summer.  For the obvious reasons of being able to pay for everything, plus I love my job.
Till later on.... Have a Nice Day!!!

Don't Look Back...Just Remember It

I must admit that I made a mistake.  For the past few weeks I have been looking back and clinging to an old idea.  Depression can do that to you.  I was looking back on something that I knew I lost, but it was for the better.  Because I let this idea go, I have been able to move forward and grow into the person that I am now.  If I had stayed with that old idea, none of this would be possible.  But the truth is, I really loved that idea.  It's one of those idea's that makes you smile just remembering it.  But I looked forward again yesterday, and realized I was only looking back at the past.  I have a lot of things back there.  Mostly sad, heart wrenching things, but there are a few special good ones.  I have learned a lot from my past, those experiences and realizations.  My message to you today is don't look back.  Stop looking at what you have put behind you.  It will only be a distraction from what you are living and achieving now.  Though don't purposely forget what you have put behind you.  Those are the things that you have built yourself upon.  Keep building.  Keep living.  It will all work out in some way or another in the end.

What a Beautiful Day!!!

What a beautiful day!
The birds are singing,
The breeze is humming,
The sky is shining!

What a beautiful day!
The trees are green,
The flowers seen,
The critters keen!

What a beautiful day!
My heart is leaping
From love worth keeping!
With joy it's seeping!

What a beautiful day!
My soul is song!
There is no wrong!
And I feel young!

What a beautiful day!

Lucky Jim... or not so lucky

There is a lingering frustration that one gets when reading Lucky Jim.  You can not put your finger on just one thing that bothers you, but it is instead the combination of it all.  Jim Dixon is a crass young idiot who hates his job and is forced to endure it because he, like many young idiots, decided to take the easy way out when it came to his education.  He's angry at the world, when the truth of it is, it's his fault that he is there in the first place.

In Kingsley Amis novel, Lucky Jim, the attitudes and circumstances on the Angry Young Men is brought into light... or is it?  These young men, like Jim Dixon, when given the opportunity of equal education as set by the government in Europe way back when.  These fellows didn't get to attend the high ranking prestigious schools of the upper class though, they were sent to the newly made Brick Universities, as they were nick named, for the in take of all the new want to be scholars.  For those who graduated from these Brick Universities, they were not taken seriously or had any easier time getting a job.  They were outcasts in a cultured traditional society.  If you want to know more about these fellow, I suggest you look them up.  It should remind you of our current southern public educational system... a joke amongst respectables.

The inner plot of the story is a battle between Jim Dixon and the Welch family.  With Prof. Welch, the battle deals with Dixon's place at the University and whether or not he is a capable teacher, not forgetting that Welch is complete;y ignorant of the world and prefers a life of music and social gatherings for his constant amusement.  With Bertrand Welch, it is over the heart of young Christine.... and the pride of who is the more modern fellow.  Bertrand is the new artist, a pompous bloke who prefers to wear french pointy hats instead of something that actually serves a purpose.  Then there is the psychotic Margaret.  I don't want to spoil that twist so please feel free to read the book.

The question of interest for some scholars is whether or not Lucky Jim actually has a happy ending.  In my quick opinion... I say yes.  It is the last laugh factor.  For my fellow sinicals, Lucky Jim doesn't have to say a word to the Welch's.  Instead a laugh is the worst possible vengeance, and gives way to a light hearted ending.

So if you are interested in a quick read and lame British humor... I definitely suggest Lucky Jim by Kingsley Amis.

Indecisive

I must admit that I am rather disappointed in myself for not keeping to this blog as originally intended.  The truth is though that I have been writing.... I just haven't felt confident enough to post my rambles recently,... and even some of my rambles really shouldn't be posted in the first place.  So in need of a motivater, I have decided to set some timed goals for myself that I will need to reflect on plus a side project that should get my creative juices flowing.
First there is the better living goal...
      In high school I was the fittest I think I will ever be in my life(hopefully I can change that.)  Since coming to CUA, I must admit that I have become good friends with the couch and reclining work chairs of which I have had constant access to these last three years.  I am proud to admit that I didn't suffer from the freshman 15,... more like freshman 5, and have kept a decent weight and composure till I moved into this apartment last May.  Since last May, I have slowly backed on extra cushioning thanks to my new life transition to a desk job and the lack of ability to work-out around my apartment because it just really isn't a good idea.  But now that spring and summer are coming back around, and I am in desperate need of some sun, I have decided to start running again.  While being a member of my high school marching band, I had the access to the schools track basically at all times.  It made running at any time... easier.  I loved running then and I still love it now, I just haven't been as devoted to it because of dancing and trying to graduate,etc.  So, the goal I am setting is for the next six weeks...  By the end of six weeks, I would like to have reached within 5 pounds of my high school weight (if that is still possible), and restore my physical endurance  levels back to where they should be.. for a girl like me.  My comparison is that I would like to be able to march a ten min. show without breaking a sweat till the last min. or so.... I know that might be hard to relate to, but my fellow bandies will know what I am reminiscing over.
Second is the new style goal...
     The thing about me is that I have never really seemed to fit into my age group... unless forced to.  For as long as I can remember, people have told me home mature I am, how I looked older than I really am, how I have an aura about me that makes me seem like an elder or wise woman, etc.  I have both loved and hated these comments.  I liked that I was able to stick out, but I disliked the lack of connection I have had with my peers.  There are a few from high school that I have remained closely connected with, but it wasn't till I got to CUA that I really found persons of my same caliber.  I still stick out amongst my peers here, but I have developed the reputation of being a sort of hard ass about everything.  I am extremely critical and am willing to question anyone about anything if I am not convinced about their arguments or beliefs.  This in combination with the fact that I have maintained a job since my sophomore year of high school makes me a  bit of a professionalistic personality.  Being a college student, you can't help recall dressing like a college student.  To put it plainly, I am sick of it.  I know that I am much more than I appear, and I would like to be able to present myself in attire that will hopefully close the gap.  If I were in TN, I would seek out the help of my sisters Olivia and Abbey, but sadly I am not in TN.  So I am stuck trying to put together a style on my own.  I know what I am looking for, the problem is that it will require almost a complete change in my wardrobe.... which actually is a marvelous idea.  Logically I can not do this all at once, so this will also have to spread out over a period of time.  My goal is that by August 15th, I will have replaced 60% of my closet with professional and semi professional attire that fits my personality.  In that 60% there will be a combination of seasonal attire that can mix without complication of seasonal storing.  I really hate my storage bins and am looking forward to tossing them eventually.
Finally the side project...
     I am a reader.  I have always been a reader.  Ask my mother.  With my extensive reading, I have come to love and hate, like and dislike, understand and confuse several topics and writers.  What I want to do is start discussing the books I am reading.  These books might be for class or for personal enjoyment.  The point of this is to help prepare me for taking the Literature GRE subject test and for my senior comps exam.  The only way I am going to be able to recall all of the multiple titles and characters and topics is if I am discussing them and comparing the on a regular basis.  For my intensive narrative class, we are having to post to every week and blurb about our current reading... what parks our interest, what bothers us, what were confused about, if we have a revelation, etc.  I will be posting my comments from there to here and the other way to try and make things more interesting.
So yeah.  That is all have to say for right now.  Tomorrow I want to address the book Lucky Jim by Kingsly Amis.  We have finished reading it in class and I want to discuss it a bit more because I do not think we through dug through the novel enough.  It was more like settling and I hate that.

Spring Break 2010

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So did I do anything spontaneous this Spring Break... absolutely not.  I instead decided to embrace the peace and quiet.  There was a bit of a rough start to it due to the new neighbors, but after that, things got much better.  Of the 8 days that made up my break, I went to the office for 4 and worked at home for the rest.  I spent three afternoons walking around the city while the weather was good.  I went to my favorite store... Barnes and Noble... got a coffee, and walked around looking at books for a few hours.  I got the 7th and 8th books in my vampire series, another Nora Roberts series (2 books), a work-out book, and two GRE books, one for the general test and one for the Literature subject exam.  I cooked absolutely delicious meals, while being extremely health conscious.  And gave my apartment the deep down spring cleaning it deserved.  I'm pretty proud of myself.  I sort-of wish that I could have hung out with my friends or did some out on the town nights, but I guess I'm not that type of girl.  I enjoy the solitude and the peace.  Don't get me wrong, I like doing all the other things, it's just nice to have the peace and quiet.

For the Love of Dance

 

So the truth of it is... I really love to dance.  I have always loved to dance.  It's my weakness really.  You don't have to get dressed up to go out dancing, you actually don't even have to go out, but dressing up is fun too.  Since I started dating Vinny, I have had to dance less, because he just doesn't like to dance.  It hurts sometimes to think about it, but I still have my tricks.  Like going out to group formal events.  There is always someone who is willing to take me around the floor.  But FYI, long dresses can be hard to do any free style mixes.

Not Going According To Plan

 

So as most people discover when they make a set of long term plans,.... things don't always go according to plan.  This can of course be very very stressful and unwanted.  But as most persons learn, there is nothing you can really do about it.  Things will happen.  That's life.

I intended to keep to this blog like a ritual, but life kicked in and said that there are more important things right now,.... or well some not as important but will be complications any way. 

Here is the gist of my situation: It seems that not a day can go by that I don't have some type of argument with my boyfriend, who I am living with.  This really sucks and is a drag for my mojo.  Classes are over-all going well enough... midterms are coming up in the next week.  I just had a very excited friend turn 21, of which we through an awesome party for her.  Sadly my calves were killing me after wards, but that was expected and did not diminish the awesome time we had.  And I am getting back in contact with some of my closest friends from high school.

Things just haven't been going the way I have wanted them too.  I still have to do my taxes, which I am not looking forward to.  Lately I have been wanting to dance, like I used to.  I can't compete in ballroom competitions anymore because of my knee, and I can't participate in the club because I, in all honesty, do not have the time, but I really really miss dancing.  I had a ton of fun at my friends 21st party because I was able to dance a lot with people.  It was like letting out all the tension I had built up to that point.  It was invigorating and releasing all at once.  I know I need to start it up again and I sort of have a plan, which I will describe later.

Well, that's been the recent activity.  Hopefully I can try to get things back under my control at least for a little while.

Here Comes More White Stuff...

I have now entered onto day 6 of no school.  I have completed all of the reading assignments assigned to me for this school week.  And I have cleaned the apartment as if it were spring cleaning. Except there are two trash bags sitting in my dinning room because I am afraid of going outside to try and put them in the dumpster. (and its not like I could ask Vinny for any help)  I fear that cabin fever has started to kick in.
The wind outside is rather harsh.  According to the weather people, I have 30 to 40 mile an hour winds outside.  I can definitely believe it.  As of right now, the wind flow is blowing against the back side of my apartment, which consists of 4 glass windows that where not completed sealed on.  All morning I have had to listen to them creak.  It's kinda freaky.  I attempted to distract myself by cleaning the apartment... which I believe turned out rather well.  The only issue was that I decided to ask Vinny to help with the living room since that is where his ass has been glued since he got back from the firehouse.  I asked him to help and his response was that of a slave speaking to a slave driver, though I guarantee you that no slave would have taken that tone with its master.  In the end I had to attempt to clean the living room.  It was not taken care of to my satisfaction because he was watching a movie and in order to prevent further confrontation I decided to leave it bee till later.  The only thing he put effort into cleaning was the tv, but then he left the dust cloth lying next to the tv, which left more work for me.  It seems I have to take up after him lately as if he were a child.  Its pathetic.  But I have to because i don't want this place looking like the house on Channing Street (Vinny's old residence).  I am proud of where I live, I just hate the fact that it seems I'm the only one taking care of it.
Thanks mom for teaching me how to take care of my own things.  And leaving me no other choice.  I pity the people who can't take care of themselves.  Because eventually they will be left alone and they will see how little they are actually prepared for this world, then they will probably run home to their mothers.
Snow please stop!!!! I need to get out of here!!! 

My Second Blizzard Ever

 

So from Feb 5-6 there was the huge snow storm that hit my area in Maryland with over 3ft of snow.  It was kind a cool, well, cold really.   Because of this I was able to enjoy an extended weekend from school.  But now it seems I am going to get to enjoy a mini-vacation.  There is a second snow storm coming our way promising over 18inches of more of that wet stuff.  I hope that I don't start suffering from cabin fever.  If anything I will continue exploring the outdoors.  It's cold but it is a ton of fun.

Botticelli's - Primavera c.1482

 

Earlier today I had my Art 212 History of Art: Renaissance to the Modern Age class.  So far I like the class, not the teacher so much, but the class is good.  But today something really got under my skin... We were discussing some early Renaissance pieces, the Primavera was one of them.  I will admit, up front, that I really do not know that much about art pieces and their artists or any of the specific movements.  That is why I am taking the class, to educate myself.  But today we were discussing a piece that I actually knew alot about.  Yea!!!! for me.  (In case you haven't caught on, it is the Primavera)  I first learned about this work way back in middle school.  A literature teacher of mine actually had a copy framed on her wall.  I was able to stare at this piece for three years, plus I was able to do several papers about and including this work of art.  Anyway, so my Art Professora starts asking us questions about this piece and the artist and the time period.  For every question she asks, I gave a response, and then she did that really annoying sound..."nnnaahhhh.... anyone else."  I was mortified.  For every answer I had, she made the sound, went to someone else and looked for other answers.  Then she went on this rant on how she was disappointed that no one did the reading and that no one could give any accurate information on such an important piece.

That was BULL SHIT!!!!

She went on some descriptive rant about the piece, and no joke, everything she said was completely rediculous.  It was like she never heard of roman mythology... She was saying how Venus was supposed to be a symbol for the Virgin Mary and that it was some kind of bridal scene.... yada, yada, yada......

Honestly people, it's not a complicated piece.  

The following is an excerpt that I think puts it in perfect perspective...

"The central theme of the Primavera is one of love and marriage and when done in the right order will bring forth sensuality and fertility. This painting, the largest mythological painting in the Early Renaissance, was commissioned by the Medici family. The painting was hung in the bedroom of a bride to a member of the Medici family.

The painting is set in a meadow complete with flowers and trees. It shows nine figures, all based on a mythological text. The man on the far left is Mercury. He is separating the clouds and moving the winter clouds away so spring can come. Cupid is above Venus and is known for his lack of morality and his attempts to take apart marriages. Venus, the goddess of love and beauty, is in the center of the picture surrounded by the Three Graces. Venus is elegantly dressed obviously reigning over the land. She is no longer the young girl in the painting Birth of Venus.

On the right, covered in flowers is Flora, the goddess of flowers and blossoms. The story about how Flora came into existence begins with her former self, Chloris. Chloris was in the woods when Zephyr, the wind god on the far right of the painting, found and raped her. To prove to Chloris that he was sorry for his violence, he married her and declared her Flora, the goddess of flowers. Botticelli depicted Chloris turning into Flora by literally painting flowers coming out of Chloris’ mouth. In this small detail, Botticelli was seen to have followed the mythology stories very closely. This story alone shows that this painting was meant to celebrate a marriage. Even the fact that Chloris was not the one to choose her mate reflects on the culture in the 15 th century. Many times, the woman had very little choice in the selection of her husband. The celebration of marriage is also shown because the garden is bursting with fruit and flowers that symbolizes the fertility expected in marriage.

Venus is the goddess who protects and cares for the institution of marriage. The myrtle plant surrounds her is traditionally thought of as the plant that represents sexual desire, marriage, and child bearing. Venus supports the fact that marriage is where sexuality is experienced, not before. The Three Graces also represent this. They portray the female virtues chastity, beauty and love. Their long, flowing coverings are characteristic of Botticelli’s painting style.

Also symbolic of love and fertility are the oranges growing in the grove. The Medici family had an orange grove on the family estate. The number of oranges Botticelli drew clearly represented the hope that this marriage would result in many offspring. Notice on the right side above Zephyr there are no oranges until the scene moves on and Flora is shown to be married and respected by Zephyr; only then will “fruit” be produced. The trees and fruit are mature showing that Venus has reached her own maturity. The land is being made fertile again after winter."

Do you see why I like this work so much???

When I'm Dreaming

In the morning or at night, people will dream.  People will dream about how they wish their life were, what they wish their life wasn't, or just anything that may come to mind.  Some will consider their dreams a vision, other will think it complete non-sense.  Whatever it is that people dream, it reveals something to them that only they can attempt to understand or explain.  It is also a possibility that their dreams might reveal nothing at all, except the inner most contemplations and secrets that the dreamer might have thought they had forgotten about or just chose to attempt to forget.

 

I have found that most of my dreams come from a mix of the stories I read and my memories from childhood and teen years.  This means that there are infinite possibilities to the dreams I have because I read a lot of books.  Depending on the story of which my dream is based, certain persons with which I have displayed similar emotions will be found in that dream.

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I have lost my train of thought now.... damn.

So I have been living in and attending school in Washington, DC for about 2 and a half years now.  I was walking to work today and it hit me.... like it does some people.... I am living in Washington, DC... the place I have had to learn about since I was a kid.  I looked to my right on the metro and there was the Capital Building and the Washington Monument... I looked at the metro map and I saw Annapolis and the Smithsonian and so many more.  Why is it that once you live some where for a certain period of time, that you actually forget where your living?

I decided to think about my first trip to DC.  It was about four and a half years ago.  And yes for those who did the math, my first trip to DC was not until my junior year of high school.  My elementary school was too cheep to take us on far out field trips.  But anyway... I went with my friend Brittney Hanley to the National Leadership Forum on Law which was being hosted in well, go figure, DC.  It was not a lot of fun, but I had a good time.  I was able to learn a lot, see a lot, and more importantly, got to tour the university I am currently attending.  The point of note is that I had never heard of CUA till this trip.  I was really disappointed actually because I wanted to go tour Georgetown, but my group was assigned to go see CUA.  I can say now that I am happy this was the case, but for those who know me, you understand that I was extremely pissed that I would have to go to see a Catholic school.  I mean I was furious.  But you know what, ya gotta give those Catholics some credit... they make some really nice buildings, and they let almost anyone work for them. (Note, I am laughing hysterically.  If you don't get the joke, I'm sorry.  O-well.)

I came to DC because of the opportunities that I could find here.  I was working for Starbucks and maintaining a status of a full-time student.  It was hard work, but I think it was the best way to learn about the real inner DC.  The people, the attitude, the atmosphere of the night and the day.  I was surprised that it wasn't what I had originally expected.  I thought this place would be hard core political and government stuff everywhere, but that is completely not the case.  I found out that the people who care the least about DC are the people who live within it.  They could care less what the current issue is.  All they want is their fair share.  I have really come to enjoy living here.  Though as I am sure many southern gals, like myself have come to learn, this is a nice place to stay a while, but not a place for you to settle down.  Not like I am going to be settling down anytime soon, I'm just saying is all.

At the most, I would say I have about another year and a half living in this crazy city.  Now that I have some more free time on my hands due to my current job, I am trying to take in as much as I can.  I want to have those crazy fun stories that most people have when they get old and have been rooted somewhere nice.  I have a few fun stories to tell, and I'm glad that I have some great friends of which I can live out these moments.
So that was my trip down memory lane for today.  I think I need to plan another outing with my people.  Something more indoors for now because it is freezing here.  Feels like 8 degrees and falling.

Some Things Are Better As Fantasy

In my Intensive Narrative class we are currently reading Bram Stoker's Dracula.  I have read the book probably three times before this.  I absolutely love it.  Only this time, I think the book is starting to get to me.  I mean, this is the second night in a row I've waken up thinking something was knocking on my window.  Really creepy.  I'm no Lucy by all means, but I still enjoy the story.

The big thing we have been hitting on in class is the amount of male suppression expressed and how it can be interpreted into sexual contexts.  So Dracula is supposed to be the alpha dominant male and yet he carries out the projects of a common woman.  He is always indoors, until he gets to London.  He is quiet and passes through the crowd without ever getting noticed.  So many female qualities in a male master.  What is Stoker saying?  Is Dracula supposed to be the entity created by an equality society?  I'm not too sure, but either way, he still is a great character.  He freaks us out because he is beyond the male and female perspective.  He is something else.  We fear the possibility of his kind being real, and we are comforted in knowing it is only a story.  It is because of the story we are drawn in.  And if you are like me you will keep coming back.  No matter how freaky it might be.

Tea or Chocolate???

I woke up this morning and enjoyed a wonderful cup of mint tea while going about my morning ritual.  It was delicious.  But after I had my tea, I went outside and and began to crave hot chocolate.  What is it about brisk cold weather that makes you think about the rich flavor of delicious hot chocolate???
I have been pondering this all day by the way.  Because I absolutely loved by tea this morning, it was great.  It was soothing yet gave me just that little pep to get going.  Plus it was mint, and who doesn't love mint.  Mint and chocolate would make it even better though.  Though I'm not quite sure how chocolate tea would taste???

So hot chocolate.  What makes it so appealing?  Could it be that warm comforting sensation that you get just from holding that cup and breathing in that sweet aroma...  Or is it that velvety rich chocolate flavor that makes the world stop for only a second that makes it so good?  What ever it is, its got me stumped.  I wish I could enjoy a cup, but I don't have any hot chocolate mix....  I tried doing the whole melting Hershey's kisses and mixing it with milk, but it didn't work out to well.
I remember when some friends of mine were melting chocolate in our apartment and ended up smoking the place.  How you smoke chocolate in a microwave is beyond me, but that is why you are supposed to use a stove top to melt chocolate.  I think that is going to my next project... figuring out how to melt chocolate properly so that it may be mixed with hot milk to make a delicious drink.
And then add mint.  :-)

Don't Say It Unless You Mean It

The thing that has been really bothering me lately is how people will say things that they don't mean and they think that no one cares.  I hate it when people tell me that they are going to do something and then they never start.  Or when someone says that they will meet you somewhere and then they never call to tell you they can't make it.
Why is it so hard to do what you say you are going to do???
(Will continue this later)

RIP Dave

Tonight I attended a party devoted to our friend who passed away on Christmas Eve. Well, in truth he did not pass away but he died in a car accident.  His name was David, and we wanted to be a healer, a doctor.  He is remembered by all to be an amazing friend and a devoted person.  He was truly the nicest guy you could ever meet.  I first met him in one of my classes at CUA my freshman year.  He was witty and charming.  Not really class clown, but he could make you smile even when what he was saying wasn't all that funny.  He wasn't one of those guys who stood out in a crowd, he sort of blended in, but for those who knew him, he was a comforting when you were alone in a crowd.  I did not get to know him that well in classes, but it just so happened that he was also really great friends with my boyfriend, so I got to see him quite often outside of school.  The greatest thing about Dave was that he was there.  He wasn't just that guy you know and never saw.  When he was in a room, he wouldn't ignore you.  He talked to everyone and made everyone feel welcome.  I'm trying to write down  what I remember of Dave, but it's kind of hard.  All I can do is smile as the memories of things he did flow through my head.  The world lost a great kid on Christmas Eve.  He really wanted to help the world.  There aren't enough guys like him here, it's sad that he couldn't complete what he wanted.  But at least he got to help a girl like me, and the many others who claim to be his friend.  I hope you are comfortable where ever you are Dave.  And I hope you know that did wonders in this world, you made us smile.

The Man Wairing No Shoes

On my way out of class today I came across a group of guys walking around with no shoes on.  It's around 40 degrees outside and these guys are walking around on cold non-swept pavement.  I can imagine that their feet consist of nothing but hardness.  Does this make sense to anyone???

I understand the whole wanting to be closer to nature thing, but dang.  From what I know of these guys, they are allowed to walk around campus that way, but once they get into a building that have to put on flip flops or something.  Does that really do anything???  I mean their feet are probably no dirtier than the bottom  of our shoes.  Which is worse... these guys walking around campus with out shoes on or walking around in doors without shoes on?  Personally I love walking around indoors without shoes on,... saves the carpet.  :-)

So, what about getting sick?  I know that if I were to walk around in cold weather without covering my feet that I would be sick within the first few days, if not that first night after attempting such a thing. 

Well, to each his own I guess.

The Burrrr Continues

So I was thinking about it... and yes... it is cold outside, but wouldn't it be better if there were snow to go with it... 

During the week before Christmas, the east coast received a down pour of snow.  A lot of snow.  Thanks to this enormous amount of snow, I got the privilege of walking a distance over two miles in knee high snow all the way home.  And yes it was mostly an uphill battle.  Being form Tennessee originally, this was my first real blizzard.  Call me crazy, but I was excited and thought it was beautiful.  All that pure white snow....

These pictures are a couple of days later.  The snow around my apartment complex reached hip high.  Several cars had to be dug out.  It was a sad thing to watch but really funny.  This tree is on my complex.  I thought it was pretty...especially with the sun in just the right spot.

I think I would very much like to see some snow soon.  It would make this cold weather we re having at least seem legitimate.  :-)

Does anyone agree???

Wow its Cold

I think I have to figure out a new way to bundle up in the mornings.  On my way to school this morning, I swear, I actually started shaking it was so cold.  I am wearing a long winter coat with extra big scarf, gloves, and a hat that somewht covers my ears.  It just doesn't seem like enough.  Burrrrrrrr.

To Be Compared To His Mother's

After slaving in the kitchen for several hours in order to prepare a special meal for that special person in your life, there is one comment that will kill any satisfaction that you might have for, in your eyes, succeeding in your endeavor: "My mother's taste better."
Now in order to be a great cook in the kitchen you must be able to take criticisms on the dishes you have prepared.  "This tastes over done, under cooked, too salty, flat, somethings missing..."  These are all basic criticisms to work off of.  But just saying that another person's dish tastes better is not productive.  You are not saying that it is good or bad, just that someone else does it better than you just did.  That hurts.
I have been experiencing this type of critical response for the past 7 months.  I in my 21yrs experience am currently being compared to a mothers 50yrs of experience.  That is 29 more yrs of learning how to make dishes just right in order to please everyone over my own.  And may I say that that is not fair.  Yes this may be my first attempt at making this dish, but at least I am trying.  I can think of a few women in the world who no matter what they make, you won't want to even try the finished dish.  At least the dish that I am presenting is edible.
I have come to believe that those men who only taste dishes in comparison to their mothers are in a sense "momma's boys."  These men are incapable of recognizing the effort that was put in by another woman in making a dish that they knew was a favorite of his.  You might think this is a little harsh, but I ask, isn't it in a sense true?  Some guys may come around and say thank you for the meal or that it was ok, but it still is nothing of a response that you had set on your good to bad meter.
Last night was the first time I got an actual response from my lover about the meal I prepared that actually helped me.  He had been gone for almost a  week on an engineering trip and had explained to me over the phone that he was not having a good time and couldn't wait to come home to me.  So I in my pleasing spirits decided to make one of his favorite meals, which his mother explained to me several months ago how to make.  He was surprised to see that I had attempted it.  And then after he tasted it he actually said it was good.  If you are thinking that maybe he came around and noticed I do not cook the same way his mother does, you would be wrong.  While at the dinner table he explained to me that his mother told him he could not keep criticizing my meals based off hers, that it was rude.  And then he smiled at me.  Thanks mom, I guess.

(This seems a bit like a rambling blog.  I'll try not to do that anymore.  But I can guarantee that this topic will be brought up again.)