Not Going According To Plan

 

So as most people discover when they make a set of long term plans,.... things don't always go according to plan.  This can of course be very very stressful and unwanted.  But as most persons learn, there is nothing you can really do about it.  Things will happen.  That's life.

I intended to keep to this blog like a ritual, but life kicked in and said that there are more important things right now,.... or well some not as important but will be complications any way. 

Here is the gist of my situation: It seems that not a day can go by that I don't have some type of argument with my boyfriend, who I am living with.  This really sucks and is a drag for my mojo.  Classes are over-all going well enough... midterms are coming up in the next week.  I just had a very excited friend turn 21, of which we through an awesome party for her.  Sadly my calves were killing me after wards, but that was expected and did not diminish the awesome time we had.  And I am getting back in contact with some of my closest friends from high school.

Things just haven't been going the way I have wanted them too.  I still have to do my taxes, which I am not looking forward to.  Lately I have been wanting to dance, like I used to.  I can't compete in ballroom competitions anymore because of my knee, and I can't participate in the club because I, in all honesty, do not have the time, but I really really miss dancing.  I had a ton of fun at my friends 21st party because I was able to dance a lot with people.  It was like letting out all the tension I had built up to that point.  It was invigorating and releasing all at once.  I know I need to start it up again and I sort of have a plan, which I will describe later.

Well, that's been the recent activity.  Hopefully I can try to get things back under my control at least for a little while.

Here Comes More White Stuff...

I have now entered onto day 6 of no school.  I have completed all of the reading assignments assigned to me for this school week.  And I have cleaned the apartment as if it were spring cleaning. Except there are two trash bags sitting in my dinning room because I am afraid of going outside to try and put them in the dumpster. (and its not like I could ask Vinny for any help)  I fear that cabin fever has started to kick in.
The wind outside is rather harsh.  According to the weather people, I have 30 to 40 mile an hour winds outside.  I can definitely believe it.  As of right now, the wind flow is blowing against the back side of my apartment, which consists of 4 glass windows that where not completed sealed on.  All morning I have had to listen to them creak.  It's kinda freaky.  I attempted to distract myself by cleaning the apartment... which I believe turned out rather well.  The only issue was that I decided to ask Vinny to help with the living room since that is where his ass has been glued since he got back from the firehouse.  I asked him to help and his response was that of a slave speaking to a slave driver, though I guarantee you that no slave would have taken that tone with its master.  In the end I had to attempt to clean the living room.  It was not taken care of to my satisfaction because he was watching a movie and in order to prevent further confrontation I decided to leave it bee till later.  The only thing he put effort into cleaning was the tv, but then he left the dust cloth lying next to the tv, which left more work for me.  It seems I have to take up after him lately as if he were a child.  Its pathetic.  But I have to because i don't want this place looking like the house on Channing Street (Vinny's old residence).  I am proud of where I live, I just hate the fact that it seems I'm the only one taking care of it.
Thanks mom for teaching me how to take care of my own things.  And leaving me no other choice.  I pity the people who can't take care of themselves.  Because eventually they will be left alone and they will see how little they are actually prepared for this world, then they will probably run home to their mothers.
Snow please stop!!!! I need to get out of here!!! 

My Second Blizzard Ever

 

So from Feb 5-6 there was the huge snow storm that hit my area in Maryland with over 3ft of snow.  It was kind a cool, well, cold really.   Because of this I was able to enjoy an extended weekend from school.  But now it seems I am going to get to enjoy a mini-vacation.  There is a second snow storm coming our way promising over 18inches of more of that wet stuff.  I hope that I don't start suffering from cabin fever.  If anything I will continue exploring the outdoors.  It's cold but it is a ton of fun.

Botticelli's - Primavera c.1482

 

Earlier today I had my Art 212 History of Art: Renaissance to the Modern Age class.  So far I like the class, not the teacher so much, but the class is good.  But today something really got under my skin... We were discussing some early Renaissance pieces, the Primavera was one of them.  I will admit, up front, that I really do not know that much about art pieces and their artists or any of the specific movements.  That is why I am taking the class, to educate myself.  But today we were discussing a piece that I actually knew alot about.  Yea!!!! for me.  (In case you haven't caught on, it is the Primavera)  I first learned about this work way back in middle school.  A literature teacher of mine actually had a copy framed on her wall.  I was able to stare at this piece for three years, plus I was able to do several papers about and including this work of art.  Anyway, so my Art Professora starts asking us questions about this piece and the artist and the time period.  For every question she asks, I gave a response, and then she did that really annoying sound..."nnnaahhhh.... anyone else."  I was mortified.  For every answer I had, she made the sound, went to someone else and looked for other answers.  Then she went on this rant on how she was disappointed that no one did the reading and that no one could give any accurate information on such an important piece.

That was BULL SHIT!!!!

She went on some descriptive rant about the piece, and no joke, everything she said was completely rediculous.  It was like she never heard of roman mythology... She was saying how Venus was supposed to be a symbol for the Virgin Mary and that it was some kind of bridal scene.... yada, yada, yada......

Honestly people, it's not a complicated piece.  

The following is an excerpt that I think puts it in perfect perspective...

"The central theme of the Primavera is one of love and marriage and when done in the right order will bring forth sensuality and fertility. This painting, the largest mythological painting in the Early Renaissance, was commissioned by the Medici family. The painting was hung in the bedroom of a bride to a member of the Medici family.

The painting is set in a meadow complete with flowers and trees. It shows nine figures, all based on a mythological text. The man on the far left is Mercury. He is separating the clouds and moving the winter clouds away so spring can come. Cupid is above Venus and is known for his lack of morality and his attempts to take apart marriages. Venus, the goddess of love and beauty, is in the center of the picture surrounded by the Three Graces. Venus is elegantly dressed obviously reigning over the land. She is no longer the young girl in the painting Birth of Venus.

On the right, covered in flowers is Flora, the goddess of flowers and blossoms. The story about how Flora came into existence begins with her former self, Chloris. Chloris was in the woods when Zephyr, the wind god on the far right of the painting, found and raped her. To prove to Chloris that he was sorry for his violence, he married her and declared her Flora, the goddess of flowers. Botticelli depicted Chloris turning into Flora by literally painting flowers coming out of Chloris’ mouth. In this small detail, Botticelli was seen to have followed the mythology stories very closely. This story alone shows that this painting was meant to celebrate a marriage. Even the fact that Chloris was not the one to choose her mate reflects on the culture in the 15 th century. Many times, the woman had very little choice in the selection of her husband. The celebration of marriage is also shown because the garden is bursting with fruit and flowers that symbolizes the fertility expected in marriage.

Venus is the goddess who protects and cares for the institution of marriage. The myrtle plant surrounds her is traditionally thought of as the plant that represents sexual desire, marriage, and child bearing. Venus supports the fact that marriage is where sexuality is experienced, not before. The Three Graces also represent this. They portray the female virtues chastity, beauty and love. Their long, flowing coverings are characteristic of Botticelli’s painting style.

Also symbolic of love and fertility are the oranges growing in the grove. The Medici family had an orange grove on the family estate. The number of oranges Botticelli drew clearly represented the hope that this marriage would result in many offspring. Notice on the right side above Zephyr there are no oranges until the scene moves on and Flora is shown to be married and respected by Zephyr; only then will “fruit” be produced. The trees and fruit are mature showing that Venus has reached her own maturity. The land is being made fertile again after winter."

Do you see why I like this work so much???

When I'm Dreaming

In the morning or at night, people will dream.  People will dream about how they wish their life were, what they wish their life wasn't, or just anything that may come to mind.  Some will consider their dreams a vision, other will think it complete non-sense.  Whatever it is that people dream, it reveals something to them that only they can attempt to understand or explain.  It is also a possibility that their dreams might reveal nothing at all, except the inner most contemplations and secrets that the dreamer might have thought they had forgotten about or just chose to attempt to forget.

 

I have found that most of my dreams come from a mix of the stories I read and my memories from childhood and teen years.  This means that there are infinite possibilities to the dreams I have because I read a lot of books.  Depending on the story of which my dream is based, certain persons with which I have displayed similar emotions will be found in that dream.

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I have lost my train of thought now.... damn.

So I have been living in and attending school in Washington, DC for about 2 and a half years now.  I was walking to work today and it hit me.... like it does some people.... I am living in Washington, DC... the place I have had to learn about since I was a kid.  I looked to my right on the metro and there was the Capital Building and the Washington Monument... I looked at the metro map and I saw Annapolis and the Smithsonian and so many more.  Why is it that once you live some where for a certain period of time, that you actually forget where your living?

I decided to think about my first trip to DC.  It was about four and a half years ago.  And yes for those who did the math, my first trip to DC was not until my junior year of high school.  My elementary school was too cheep to take us on far out field trips.  But anyway... I went with my friend Brittney Hanley to the National Leadership Forum on Law which was being hosted in well, go figure, DC.  It was not a lot of fun, but I had a good time.  I was able to learn a lot, see a lot, and more importantly, got to tour the university I am currently attending.  The point of note is that I had never heard of CUA till this trip.  I was really disappointed actually because I wanted to go tour Georgetown, but my group was assigned to go see CUA.  I can say now that I am happy this was the case, but for those who know me, you understand that I was extremely pissed that I would have to go to see a Catholic school.  I mean I was furious.  But you know what, ya gotta give those Catholics some credit... they make some really nice buildings, and they let almost anyone work for them. (Note, I am laughing hysterically.  If you don't get the joke, I'm sorry.  O-well.)

I came to DC because of the opportunities that I could find here.  I was working for Starbucks and maintaining a status of a full-time student.  It was hard work, but I think it was the best way to learn about the real inner DC.  The people, the attitude, the atmosphere of the night and the day.  I was surprised that it wasn't what I had originally expected.  I thought this place would be hard core political and government stuff everywhere, but that is completely not the case.  I found out that the people who care the least about DC are the people who live within it.  They could care less what the current issue is.  All they want is their fair share.  I have really come to enjoy living here.  Though as I am sure many southern gals, like myself have come to learn, this is a nice place to stay a while, but not a place for you to settle down.  Not like I am going to be settling down anytime soon, I'm just saying is all.

At the most, I would say I have about another year and a half living in this crazy city.  Now that I have some more free time on my hands due to my current job, I am trying to take in as much as I can.  I want to have those crazy fun stories that most people have when they get old and have been rooted somewhere nice.  I have a few fun stories to tell, and I'm glad that I have some great friends of which I can live out these moments.
So that was my trip down memory lane for today.  I think I need to plan another outing with my people.  Something more indoors for now because it is freezing here.  Feels like 8 degrees and falling.

Some Things Are Better As Fantasy

In my Intensive Narrative class we are currently reading Bram Stoker's Dracula.  I have read the book probably three times before this.  I absolutely love it.  Only this time, I think the book is starting to get to me.  I mean, this is the second night in a row I've waken up thinking something was knocking on my window.  Really creepy.  I'm no Lucy by all means, but I still enjoy the story.

The big thing we have been hitting on in class is the amount of male suppression expressed and how it can be interpreted into sexual contexts.  So Dracula is supposed to be the alpha dominant male and yet he carries out the projects of a common woman.  He is always indoors, until he gets to London.  He is quiet and passes through the crowd without ever getting noticed.  So many female qualities in a male master.  What is Stoker saying?  Is Dracula supposed to be the entity created by an equality society?  I'm not too sure, but either way, he still is a great character.  He freaks us out because he is beyond the male and female perspective.  He is something else.  We fear the possibility of his kind being real, and we are comforted in knowing it is only a story.  It is because of the story we are drawn in.  And if you are like me you will keep coming back.  No matter how freaky it might be.

Tea or Chocolate???

I woke up this morning and enjoyed a wonderful cup of mint tea while going about my morning ritual.  It was delicious.  But after I had my tea, I went outside and and began to crave hot chocolate.  What is it about brisk cold weather that makes you think about the rich flavor of delicious hot chocolate???
I have been pondering this all day by the way.  Because I absolutely loved by tea this morning, it was great.  It was soothing yet gave me just that little pep to get going.  Plus it was mint, and who doesn't love mint.  Mint and chocolate would make it even better though.  Though I'm not quite sure how chocolate tea would taste???

So hot chocolate.  What makes it so appealing?  Could it be that warm comforting sensation that you get just from holding that cup and breathing in that sweet aroma...  Or is it that velvety rich chocolate flavor that makes the world stop for only a second that makes it so good?  What ever it is, its got me stumped.  I wish I could enjoy a cup, but I don't have any hot chocolate mix....  I tried doing the whole melting Hershey's kisses and mixing it with milk, but it didn't work out to well.
I remember when some friends of mine were melting chocolate in our apartment and ended up smoking the place.  How you smoke chocolate in a microwave is beyond me, but that is why you are supposed to use a stove top to melt chocolate.  I think that is going to my next project... figuring out how to melt chocolate properly so that it may be mixed with hot milk to make a delicious drink.
And then add mint.  :-)

Don't Say It Unless You Mean It

The thing that has been really bothering me lately is how people will say things that they don't mean and they think that no one cares.  I hate it when people tell me that they are going to do something and then they never start.  Or when someone says that they will meet you somewhere and then they never call to tell you they can't make it.
Why is it so hard to do what you say you are going to do???
(Will continue this later)

RIP Dave

Tonight I attended a party devoted to our friend who passed away on Christmas Eve. Well, in truth he did not pass away but he died in a car accident.  His name was David, and we wanted to be a healer, a doctor.  He is remembered by all to be an amazing friend and a devoted person.  He was truly the nicest guy you could ever meet.  I first met him in one of my classes at CUA my freshman year.  He was witty and charming.  Not really class clown, but he could make you smile even when what he was saying wasn't all that funny.  He wasn't one of those guys who stood out in a crowd, he sort of blended in, but for those who knew him, he was a comforting when you were alone in a crowd.  I did not get to know him that well in classes, but it just so happened that he was also really great friends with my boyfriend, so I got to see him quite often outside of school.  The greatest thing about Dave was that he was there.  He wasn't just that guy you know and never saw.  When he was in a room, he wouldn't ignore you.  He talked to everyone and made everyone feel welcome.  I'm trying to write down  what I remember of Dave, but it's kind of hard.  All I can do is smile as the memories of things he did flow through my head.  The world lost a great kid on Christmas Eve.  He really wanted to help the world.  There aren't enough guys like him here, it's sad that he couldn't complete what he wanted.  But at least he got to help a girl like me, and the many others who claim to be his friend.  I hope you are comfortable where ever you are Dave.  And I hope you know that did wonders in this world, you made us smile.